Little Johnny was in maths class one day and the teacher asks him "Johnny if there are 5 birds sitting on a power line, and a farmer comes and shoots 2 of them, how many birds are left on the powerline?"
Johnny thinks about it and answers, "None"
The teacher replies, "No, there would be 3 left, but why did you say none?"
Johnny replies "The others would have flown away when they heard the gun go off"
The teacher smiles and says "I like the way you think "
Little Johnny thinks to himself and then says "Miss, can I ask you a question?"
"Sure" she replies.
"Miss if there are 3 women sitting on a park bench eating icecreams, the first one is licking her icecream, the second is sucking her icecream and the third is biting hers, which one is married?"
The teacher thinks hard about it, not sure what to answer and says, "the one sucking her icecream"
Little Johnny says "No, the one with the wedding ring on her finger.................. but I like the way you think"
..........................................................................
A blind man enters a Ladies Bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?" The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is just fair - giving that you are blind - that you should know five things:
1 - The bartender is a blonde girl.
2 - The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3 - I'm a 6 feet tall, 120 kg blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
4 - The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional
weightlifter.
5 - The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler.
Now think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and declares, "Nah... Not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
Croc.
Hey minir...... Little Johnny
Hey minir...... Little Johnny
Croc.
Remember: Wherever you go in life, you take yourself with you.It will be long, it will be hard and there will be no withdrawal.
Winston Churchill
